How Soccer Got Cool in Portland
American soccer has breached a new height in popularity last week, following Timber Joey’s passion and devotion to show what the beautiful game truly is about.
So, of course, we thought soccer is just a sissy sport the British invented, consisting of 22 ladies diving around the pitch hoping to obtain things known as free-kicks and penalties, so the game won’t end 0-0. But oh dear, did the Portland Timbers’ mascot prove us wrong!
YES! CAAARVE! PLAAAGUE! SCAAR! STAAAB! By annihilating that treacherous log, good ol’ Timber Joey showed us that soccer can also mean pain, virility, fighting for righteousness and eventually, HELL YEAH, blood.. or oh well, sawdust. Now, are you askin’ me about the result of that game? ARE YOU KIDDIN’ ME? Timbers grubbed out Chicago!
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About Leetsquivel: Master procrastinator attempting on a cure. Highlighter of the absurd layer of life and Doctor of the pulling-out-of-context technique. Enjoys writing about anything that stirs up his interest. Life is worth living for the lulz!