Being in a long term relationship means discussing many different subjects. But some topics can make your heart beat faster, which are sex, politics, personal beliefs, and, yes, money.
And it’s the last one that has been one of the leading causes of stress in relationships, leading to breakups and divorces. Every couple, beyond ages, has to have a money-related discussion at some point in their relationship.
That’s why it’s crucial to know how to talk about it. Keep in mind that discussing financial matters is vital if you want to live happily together. To learn more about it, keep reading. In the article below, you’ll find tips on how to discuss money matters with your partner.
When to Talk About Money?
The first question regarding financial planning is when to start it. You can ask your partner about finances on the first date, of course, but think twice before you do that. You don’t want to scare them off, do you?
The best advice is to discuss money when you notice that your relationship is turning into a more serious one. But in reality, it’s hard to say what is the best moment for such a discussion.
Planning your financial goals together means that you want to take your relationship to the next level, and that may scare your partner. The good idea is to mention finances at some point, and see whether your partner takes the bait. If they do, it means that they feel the same way about your relationship.
You can also set a money date, for example, that you’re going to discuss money after a particular milestone in your relationship.
Now that you know when it’s time to learn how to talk about money with your partner. And the first and the most important rule is- be honest with each other. Remember that it’s your future you’re talking about here.
Tell your partner how your finances are doing, whether you have any debt, or everything is alright with your credit card. These are simple things, but many couples are afraid to discuss it until it’s too late.
What’s more, you also need to ask your partner questions regarding the subject. Find out whether you feel the same about certain things. Your partner can have completely different opinions about money and how to deal with them in your relationship.
Plan Your Future
The second thing you need to know about when talking to your partner about finances is that it’s best to set money goals you want to achieve together. Do you want to buy a house together, or maybe it’s best to rent a flat?
What’s more, you also need to discuss if you want to open a shared bank account, or would you rather have separate ones. Talk about your spending habits, and pick the right option for you.
You should also discuss whether you pay for everything together, or keep your expenses for yourself. Bear in mind that one thing is to keep your purchases, and other is keep them hidden for your partner.
Take Your Time
Relationships are a process. With time, you get more intimate with each other and start talking about certain things, including money. That’s why you should take your time, and step by step get more financially intimate.
Take into account that money can be a sensitive topic for some people, and you can’t play open cards with them from the beginning. As mentioned before, you can create a plan on when to have conversations about your finances and have one every time you take an essential step in your relationship.
Doing that will allow you to know each other better, and see how comfortable both of you are with shared (or not shared) finances.
Talking about money can be uncomfortable, especially when you’re at the beginning of a relationship, but it’s a conversation you can’t skip. It’s also not a good idea to postpone it until it’s too late. That’s why it’s crucial to know when and how to discuss finances with your partner.
If you’re planning your life together, money is one of the essential things you need to talk about. The best idea is to create a plan when to have a discussion about financial matters and divide it into steps.
Remember to be honest with your partner, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Your ideas on how to deal with your money can be completely different, so it’s crucial to find a consensus you’re both going to be happy and comfortable with.