Are you afraid of mustaches? Do you find them repulsive? Do you think that only a small number of men should be allowed to sport one and that only if they’re basically Johnny Depp look-alikes? Well here’s some nightmare material for you then.

1. KEN – By Request Only (1976)

Mustache Creepy Man Album Cover

Widely considered to exhibit the worst album cover of all time, Ken’s country gospel effort got so much Internet fame due to its dreadful appearance that it actually sold on eBay for prices as high as $150.

2. JIM POST – I Love My Life (1978)


Singer-songwriter Jim Post even had one song charted on the Billboard Hot 100. But that was, of course, in 1968, before he loved his life.

3. BEN CRAMER – Barbara (1975)


This dutch singer actually represented his country once in the Eurovision song contest. I guess this Ben must’ve been some standard of beauty in those days in the Netherlands.

4. JOHN KINCADE – Seit ich Dich küßte (1973)


Just check out that smile on John. Back in the 70’s no woman stood a chance resisting this lady-killer.

5. DARKO DOMIJAN – Ruže u snijegu (1983)


Now ladies, put on your best outfit ’cause this Eastern European Casanova is about to take you to a romantic dinner. And some serious mustache snuggling.

6. HERBIE MANN – Push Push (1971)


Sodomy by jazz flute? You’ve got it! This album is actually rated 4 stars out of 5 on allmusic. Can you stop the nipple stare?

7. ARNAUD RODRIGUES – Som do Paulinho (1976)


There’s nothing like a Brazilian lady with a classy mustache & sunglasses asking to hold your hand in the park. I’d say go for it.

8.  ???? ????? – ????????????


I know, right? What is this, I don’t even… well, it actually looks pretty much like Thai-Thug to me. And Thai massage just got a whole new meaning.

9. DARWIN DEEZ – Radar Detector (2010)


Hipster Mustache? More like an excuse to be the real moron you always wanted to be. Indie Pop tongue-in-cheek is one thing, but Darwin here takes douchebaggery to unaccountable peaks.

10. CHICO DEBARGE – Talk To Me (1986)


And to conclude, what could possibly be better than a treasure trail beneath a proud mustache-wearer’s bare belly button?

Album covers from rateyourmusic