Your child is finishing high school, and suddenly you’re in a new phase. Whether they’re headed to college, trade school, or just figuring out what comes next, the financial side of it all can feel like a lot. You’re not alone in thinking, “How do I help without putting myself in a hole?” The good news is that it doesn’t have to be complicated. The first step is knowing what you can realistically offer and having a plan you both understand.

Know Where You Stand With Savings

If you’ve saved in something like an RESP, that can be a huge help. But not all plans go the way we think they will. Your child might decide on a different path, or they might not use all the money you’ve saved. That’s when it helps to know what happens to unused RESP money. A lot of parents worry the money will be lost, but there are actually a few solid options. You may be able to transfer it to another child, keep it for later, or in some cases, get a portion of it back. The important thing is knowing your choices early so you don’t feel stuck later.

Be Honest About What You Can Offer

It’s easy to assume that kids understand money once they turn 18, but the truth is, most don’t. Having an honest, simple conversation with them can save a lot of stress. Be clear about what you’re able to help with. Maybe you can cover part of tuition, but they’ll need to work part-time to handle rent or food. That’s okay. Helping doesn’t mean doing everything. It just means giving them a steady place to start from.

You can also help them understand how to manage money on their own. Show them how to set up a budget, track spending, and use a savings account. These things might seem small, but they go a long way when someone’s just starting out.

There’s More Than One Path to Support

Not every kid goes straight to college. Some might take a gap year, start a trade, or jump into work. Whatever the path, support doesn’t always have to be financial. If they’re working, maybe you help out by covering their phone bill or letting them live at home while they save up. If they’re studying, help with books or transportation instead of a big lump sum. These smaller things can add up and make a big difference.

Don’t Forget Your Own Finances

As much as you want to give your child a head start, you can’t forget about your own financial needs. That includes your rent, your retirement, and your savings goals. If helping them puts you in a tough spot, it’s okay to say no. Support works best when it doesn’t come at your own expense.

Explore Other Ways to Lend a Hand

Support isn’t just about money. Helping them cook, teaching them how to budget, or even just giving advice when they ask can be just as valuable as writing a check. Even something as simple as letting them stay with you rent free can really help them save and build up cash for what’s most important – their future.